My son has one childhood and I can’t believe his school experience has been this poor

My son started his secondary school in September, and gets sent out of lessons pretty much every day for things like not concentrating and fidgeting. These are ADHD behaviours – he was formally diagnosed towards the end of primary school – I feel like he’s punished for his condition.

I don’t expect boundaries to change for my child at all but I but expect some different strategies put into place to help him cope that with his everyday life at school. The move from primary to secondary school alone has been a huge change for him.

I’m having constant meetings with the SEND department, suggesting strategies that have helped in the past, like using blu tack to help him stop fiddling, and it’s always agreed on at the time, yet when he’s actually in the classroom it all seems to fall apart. Once he was told to head to the SEND department if he felt he needed it, then when he did he got sent to detention for not being in the classroom.

He’s at the point where he just feels he can’t win. No matter what he does to try and improve himself to fit into this school, every day, it’s just a fail and it has a knock his well being. It’s  damaging his mental health, giving him an even lower level of self esteem.

The environment doesn’t allow kids to let off steam at all. He went from having an hour and a half a day at primary school to run around like a maniac and get rid of his energy, to now where they have less than an hour per day. 

It’s the practical lessons that he gets most enjoyment out of, but they don’t get them that often. Recently in his cooking class, he was actually removed and put into detention for not completing some homework.

And when he gets sent out of the classroom it’s for 2.5 hours per day. I’m told he’s still following the curriculum but I know he has missed so much education.

The school phone me nearly every day, and I have to try and fix the problems that they’ve created, by mismanaging everything. Yet at the same time, they make us parents feel so inadequate. 

My son only has one childhood and I can’t believe his school experience has been this poor.